There were times when ‘Pageants’ showcased the best and the brightest, brought together beauty and brains, while highlighting talents and national pride as well. Are those days gone? We have the international events at grand arenas, stadiums, and convention centres holding thousands in the audience, enraptured by the visual spectacle that includes the latest in the most dazzling technological advances. The screens light up with high resolution details of each participant, and the audience is ultra interactive with their support for their favourites. Done right these are amazing events, with much excitement and positivity.
Or at least this is what it should be. Cut to some of the local ‘pageants’, where anyone and everyone can make it onto the stage and into the finale event which is an assault on the senses, and a sham in every sense of the word. Franchise holders in my belief should be qualified, and not just ‘money-fied’, where they can make decisions based on the cornerstones of the pageant ethos, and not on the most money they can make. Unfortunately, in Sri Lanka there are many pageants for every category, where the applications are open to all and sundry, with very little in the areas of selection processes that are based on reality and potential from an international perspective. Do not get me wrong, anyone and everyone can have fantasies of winning internationally, of wearing the coveted crown, the sash, and doing the ‘winner’s walk’. As I said, for the majority of human beings this is fantasy and should remain as fantasy. Sadly, this is not the case. Could it be that it is a sign of the times, that the ‘anything you can do I can do better’ adage has been boosted with steroids and whitening serums, so as to be an over inflated cartoon version of itself? Is it that knowing one’s limitations, understanding that we each have our own strengths and weaknesses, is a thing of the past, and no one seems to realize that just because we want something, does not mean we get it? I am simply baffled by the misinterpretations and misunderstandings that now underline the local pageant industries.
Usually, the fine print in the agreements would specify what a contestant should basically possess in order to participate in a particular pageant. If for example someone joined a choir, you would hope they could actually sing. If someone wanted to be part of a dance troupe, again, we hope there is some semblance of rhythm. Or is this asking too much? My sister Dinushka sings beautifully whereas I cannot hold a tune. If I sing on the other hand, birds die. I am lucky if I am able to mumble my way through singing “Happy Birthday” as quietly as possible, without causing winces of horror from those in earshot. My niece Tehani is an accomplished dancer and has been part of many local and international dance events. My mother is an accomplished writer, poetess, humourist and my grandmother’s speaking was bathed in witticism. Each of us has strengths, and usually we are not jacks of all trades. Many unfortunately do not listen to their inner common sense and innate self-awareness and just follow the mantra of “I will because I can”.
Getting into specifics is sometimes too painful and gag reflex invoking but let me try to skim through some of the horrors we have beheld. If the franchise holder, preliminary judges, and the actual applicants know that on average a certain height requirement exists, it may not be carved in stone, but looking at international past winners one should be able to see a continuous pattern. Breaking the mold is what we are expected to do, but the chances of doing that when an average winner’s height is five foot eleven and you are four foot eleven, means you are stretching the imagination a bit far. What about talent? Your mother telling you that you are a talented violinist, and a violinist telling you that, are two very different things.
From mimes to contortionists, to dancers, to musicians, the juggling and jiggling are unfortunately out there in full force. Averting one’s eyes if one is trapped in the audience is all one can do. Or pray for temporary unconsciousness.
Then comes the predatory factor. For many out there, being an organizer, a sponsor, or a judge is their opportunity to prey on the contestants in the hopes of bedding them. Men wooing contestants young enough to be their granddaughters, offering them overseas travel, a designer bag or dress, and in some cases the actual crown, is nauseating to say the least. They speak of their yachts and jets, their ownership of villas and valleys in the hope that some country lass would fall for their charade and subsequently fall into a horizontal position. The flip side, no pun intended, highlights the men seeking fun times with their own gender. The male pageants are an open field hunting ground for these predatory types salivating over every whiff of testosterone and flexed muscle. For some of these desperate cases, who have to get it where they can, using their perceived influence and temporary, very limited power is their only way to get someone into bed. We have seen this over and over again where the horror stories are only getting worse. From offering expert advice, endorsements, influence and future deals the pathetic vibe is tangible as they barter, beg and badger, in the hope that some unsuspecting male contestants’ pants would fly off. Everyone sees it, everyone knows it, but the shocker to me in the 21st century is that no one says anything. If anyone speaks up after the pageant it is considered sour grapes and bitterness from a non-winner, and we all know the winners would not say anything to bring the spotlight onto something where they also could have been complicit and won in the same way.
With the #MeToo movement now being engrained in our collective thinking, how are we still letting this nonsense happen? To each his own, and as long as they are consenting adults, what, who, when and where is not anyone’s concern. Predatory behaviour though, especially when focused on the powerless by the powerful, is simply despicable. That needs to be curtailed, highlighted and stopped. If you see blatant misdeeds speak up, highlight and point them out. Speaking up and protecting those who are vulnerable and sometimes unable to defend themselves is our right, and most importantly our duty. Take responsibility and let us work on making not just pageants, but the many industries and societal stratas we are in, a safe and nurturing space.
